Another Sleepless Night & Blog Post Later.

Okay guys.. C'mon, lets be real for a minute. My last few posts have Not been the brightest of the bunch. In all honesty, I don't know how to explain unless I'm a little more specific than usual. You know me, I'm usually quite vague. Here goes nothing..

So, I have a Very very dear friend to me named, ______(if you know me well enough, you know who it is). We have been friends for quite some time, he knows me so well. He's always been the friend I talk to about when something happens in my family, I turn to him for advice, ask him if I should cut my hair or not, etc. He always knows what to do, where to take me, what to ask, how to tell if I'm okay or not, how to comfort me. He knows me more than any other friend I have. I can't even begin to express how much this guy means to me. I do have hope. I have hope for a lot of things. One thing I hope for is, maybe he'll read this and maybe he'll realize how Amazing he really is. He doesn't read this very much. It's not like I mind, but I hope that if he does he'll feel like he means the world to someone, like he's changed someones life like no one else could, like there's someone out there who will Never give up on him. That's me. He has a mission coming up. In six months, to be exact. Which is so exciting. However, when that happens you can't really continue All that you have going on with that other person.

Recently we've talked. As you can read from before, we'll be waiting a while until we continue anything more on our being together. Which, yes, has made me quite sad. I've been having a little bit of a hard time, I'm not going to sugar coat it, but don't worry about me. It's for the better and it's the right thing to do. That's what I'm told.

I'm going to miss him so much, and um.. yes, I will cry so much the ocean will probably double in size when he leaves. I'm excited for him, though. What a great thing he gets to do. Serve the Lord and be a messenger for him for two years. Giving those two years, so others can be together forever. I'm so proud of him. I really am. I can't describe all the emotions inside of me, but I can say that he is going to make an Amazing missionary. He doubts himself quite a bit, sometimes, but I know Whole heartedly that he is going to touch hearts, teach souls, and represent the Lord with pride.

Best of wishes. Make us proud. Write every week.